Choosing sides for the holidays?

[Danielle]

Do you have to choose which side of the family you spend the holidays with or do you have a holiday routine such as Christmas Eve with one side and Christmas Day with the other?

Tell us how your family fits everyone in over the holidays.


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For our family it's easy. Dh's relatives are in Jamaica and mine are on the East coast. We just stay here and see who decides to come here for Christmas :D.

[Sam]

This year yes.

I always go round my mums, Tom always goes round his mums and last year we both went to my mums and MIL missed him/ us terribly and he felt bad. This year we are going round the MIL's because I think it is fair we alternate years. I feel awful that I can not be with my mum when I want to be there but that is life I guess.

The worst thing is the boys are going to their dads so this year will be tough for me :(

[Danielle]

:hugs Sam. That IS tough. Will you have them on Christmas Eve?

[Kristi]

Well unfortunately for me my husband hates driving down to Florida and I can't drive. So we are almost always stuck spending the holidays with his family if anyone. Last yr we were in NC with his family on Christmas and I HATED it. This yr I put my foot down and said we were not going to be anywhere on Christmas that we could go down and celebrate with them before or after but not on. I prefer on the holidays to be at home with just the five us especially Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. We will not be spending those with any one.

[Sam]

Yes, they get to open their presents then they are off.

I know it is only fair me and their dad alternate years but it just feels so wrong going round my MIL's with Jasmine when half of my family isn't with me. I will suck it up as not to ruin everyones day but all I want is my family together with my mum. I love my MIL but I have never been away from my mum on Xmas day and being a mummys girl it is tough not to have her here and the boys.

[Lori]

This year we're staying home. :D

We haven't had a Christmas at home as a family ever. We always travel. The last two years it's been really terrible weather either going or coming home, which is kind of scary on a 12-hour drive through the Pennsylvania mountains, so we've decided to spend what we think will be our last Christmas in Michigan at home, with the three of us. We're going to get a tree, and have a nice dinner, and hopefully have a really nice, relaxing time. We usually end up feeling like we need a vacation after our vacation, so hopefully this time we'll be started the winter term nice and refreshed. :D

[Kristen]

We switch between the families...we do one family for Thanksgiving, and then the other family on Christmas afternoon(we stay home on Christmas morning and do our own thing).

This year, we are TRYING to get my IL's to come here on Christmas Day, but they haven't committed to that yet.

[gr8mommy]

Nope. The first year we were married we decided to stay home and invite everyone to us. I knew I didn't want to travel at Christmastime after we had kids, so I thought it would set a bad precedent if we did it at all. It works beautifully. However, we do have small families--my MIL is the only living relative now on DH's side, and I have one sister. She stays home too, and has her inlaws and my father/stepmother for the holidays. I get my mom and stepdad. Our grandma is the one that alternates holidays now! LOL

[Danielle]

LOL Denise, my grandmothers do the same. They have more time off to travel anyway :D.

[Jbird]

We always see my family at Thanksgiving - bigger tradition in my extended family. We spend Christmas at home - sort of our family rule. Taryn either goes to her mom's or comes back home on Christmas Eve, so that limits our flexibility too. Depending on the year, with her, we celebrate with the in-laws on Christmas Eve or Christmas morning, but at our house if it's Christmas morning. My parents came one year and are invited every year, but I have three sisters who live all over the place, so they kind of have to pick. Instead, Delaney and I are flying with my parents to California the week before Christmas (my sister Laura lives in Monterey). We manage to work it out. :)

[Jo]

We stay here. Dave's parents are dead so that isn't an issue. My parents want to get everyone together in Minnesota every year but it won't work out this year. My SIL is due January 13th so they are staying in Florida to be near them. I am actually fine with this. It will make Christmas so easy. Dave's schedule is crazy since he is in retail. The less to do the better!

[TracyS]

Last year, as both our folks had lived in the same city we split it up. Did mom's xmas morning & his folks in the evening. Dh's side is much more into hosting large family dinners then my mom is.

This year is more kaotic with us moving this month so it'll be more jumbled. My folks moved down here so we'll be doing more extended family stuff here for xmas day as our tree I've set it up at moms & we'll do our morning there & then the evening will be over at my aunts place. As the majority of the moving will be done boxing day - 28th once things are in place we'll do a pop up north to see the inlaws probably for new years.

[Shasta]

We do the same thing every year. On Christmas Eve we go to my uncles for snacks and exchange gifts, for an hour or two, then we go to Mike's family (this year at his aunts) and exchange gifts and have a big supper.

On Christmas Day, we spend the morning together at our house and then go to my mom's in the afternoon to have a meal and exchange gifts.

It works pretty good except that I hate rushing at my uncle's on Christmas Eve, I would like to just stay and have fun and not have to worry about getting somewhere else. Although I love Mike's family's get together too. I just wish we had more time for both.

[Mary]

With my parents living 1500 miles away the only holiday that really requires a decision is Christmas. The other holidays don't give the kids enough time off school to bother going all that way.

Before Madalyn was in elementary we would alternate years between here and there for Christmas. It wasn't a big deal because we could go visit out there at other times of the year. But when she started real school we became limited to three times a year to go out there: Christmas, summer and spring break. So then the plan became that we would go out there every Christmas. Well, that hasn't worked out, either, because the last two years we've had to cancel at the last minute due to finances and poor flight availability. This year we're back on track, though. We'll be flying out on the 22nd and staying through the 4th. :)

I would like my parents to come here for Christmas but my dad won't fly and my mom has a phobia of driving in snow. I got them to come one year and they hit a teeny bit of snow on the way home and my mom about had a cow. So unless my dad suddenly decides to quit being a chicken and get on an airplane they won't be coming for Christmas again!