Do the difficult times in your life make you stronger?

[Jo]

Have you been through times that were so tough that when you look back nothing seems as bad? Does that give you strength?

[Heather]

Definitely. Things were rough between dh and I for quite a long time and everything seems like roses these days compared to what all we went through before. Same as when the boys were born(S & J)... it was a rough, scary time. Now that I'm a bit older I can finally put stuff into perspective though, regarding all of that stuff. I know it made me stronger. Wouldn't do it all again lol, but yeah.. it definitely all changed me and now, these days, I can actually look at things and tell myself "that's not a big deal" whereas just a few years ago I still wasn't past a lot of it.

[Kristi]

Definetly. The hardest time for me was when my sister died (she was only 17) and I was living in Italy and 9 months pregnant and could not go home to be with my family. Then dealing with a new baby and the grief from loosing her. Things definetly seem so much easier now compared to that time.

[SarahJ]

Absolutely. I've been through a lot of crap in the last few years (mostly medical) and I believe that I can pretty much face anything life has to throw at me.

[Beka]

yes they make you stronger but to be honest i'd merrily be a weaker person who'd not had to go through some terribly heartbreaking and impossible times - they were worth it as eventually they've had a reason, they've (mostly) panned out for the best but i'm still jealous of people who've managed to get to the same life points as me without enduring those things to get there

[Sam]

Yes they do make me stronger in some ways but some times hard times knock a bit more trust out of me.

Ive gone through hell and back in my 25 years but finally I am in a good place with loving,healthy people around me. It took a while for me to let someone love me and try to forget everything my dad drummed into me but I am getting better all the time.

I feel I am stronger for having to go through so much with the boys,especially Ross but again there are times where I feel sorry for myself because I want a break from it all so I cry a lot,grieve a lot and wake up the next day feeling stronger.

[Emily]

Do the difficult times in your life make you stronger? Have you been through times that were so tough that when you look back nothing seems as bad? Does that give you strength?

Yes, yes, and yes!! After Kierra got sick I found strength I never knew I had. After she died, I realized I am one very strong woman and that I can get through anything life has to throw my way (not htat I will like it or agree, but I CAN get through it). That being said, I would much rather be weak and never gone through everything I did (as Beka said). I believe loosing a child is the worst thing anyone can go through (not saying it is, just what I believe) and nothing else I will ever go through will be as tough as that - nothing! Knowing that does give me strength to continue on when so many others would have given up.

[Jejune]

Honestly? Sometimes I think we just tell ourselves that hard times make us stronger so that we can get through them. I know that my personality has been shaped by hard times, and sometimes for the better, but I think a lot of my personality flaws also come from hard times. I'm more fearful, more hesitant, more anxious than I used to be. It's hard for me to get through the day sometimes, and I can track that back to hard times pretty easily. Sure, some elements make us stronger, but some elements tear us down.

Edited: I wrote this before I read what anyone else had written. Seeing people's personal stories, I can easily believe that hard times have lent others strength. I can only say what I've experienced. The hard times in my family drove us all further apart. I tend not to find suffering conducive to virtue, as a result. But I don't mean to shut down anyone else's experience.

[Joni]

In my experience, the difficult times have taught me valuable lessons, but not necessarily made me stronger. I can think of things I've gone through that I've gained nothing but heartache from. But other things--I've gained insight, a different outlook, sympathy for others, perhaps strength...it all depends on the situation.

[Kristen]

Well, I know hard times strengthen my faith, for sure. and I certainly become more heavenly minded when life on this earth is sucky. :p

and I know that God promises that He is working through all the hard things for my good. I might not see the good right then and there....it might take years and years before I see the fruit from a hard time, but I know SOMETHING good will come out of it.

Probably the hardest things I've been thru in my life have been my pregnancies...I can't say for sure that I know why God allowed me to go through all those months of suffering, and I don't know that I became a woman of really great character from going thru that, but I hope that maybe one day, I'll be able to help someone else who's going thru something like that.

[Christine]

I have to agree with both Kristens.

On the one hand, there are experiences in my past that are still causing me grief today. The things I experienced in my home life growing up left some pretty big scars that have hurt me and my relationships. I don't think those experiences have made me stronger, but they have brought me more clarity to see what I truly value and want from this life. They also make me very aware of how blessed I am.

And to agree with the other Kristen, most of my difficult experiences have brought me closer to God and that can only be a good thing. ;)

[Sam]

some elements make us stronger, but some elements tear us down.

Yes,I am a lot more wary,anxious and even afraid the older ive got and the more hurt and let down I have been.

[MomOfHeathens]

I think even before the kids and I were diagnosed with cancer the difficult times had definately made me stronger. Now it honestly has come to a point where it's either going to make me stronger or kill me and statisticly my life is already short enough so homey ain't goin' down like that! ;)

[Shana]

Honestly? Sometimes I think we just tell ourselves that hard times make us stronger so that we can get through them. I know that my personality has been shaped by hard times, and sometimes for the better, but I think a lot of my personality flaws also come from hard times. I have to say that for me personally, I agree. I know that I have learned a lot about myself through the hard times, and that sense has been knocked into my head (finally!) through them.

Hum, but am I STRONGER? No, I don't think so. Am I more wise about life, and in the decisions that I make? Yes, absolutely ;)

[Lori]

I think that difficult times can show us that we have a strength we didn't know we had, but I'm not sure they necessarily make us stronger. I definitely think that we can use difficult experiences as a way to become stronger--if we take conscious action to get through the experience in a positive way, then I do think that can help make us a stronger person--but I don't think that just living through a difficult experience makes us stronger, and instead just reveals to us that we are stronger than we might have thought.

[Jejune]

Lori, you articulated what I was thinking about last night. As I was going to bed, I thought, "Wait. Hard times don't make us stronger, but they do show us how strong we actually are."

I know that most of the time, before we experience something, we watch other people going through it and think, "I could never handle that. I could never make it through something like that and still be a whole person." And then we experience it and survive, maybe even with grace, and it reveals a strength we had that we didn't know we could lean on.

[Emily]

I thought about this a lot yesterday and was coming back to somewhat change what I had said. Of course Lori and Kristen both just said what I wanted to (and so much better than I would have). After really thinking about it - everything I've been through hasn't made me stronger, just made me much more aware of my strength. Saying that, I am going to stick with nothing else I go through will ever be as bad or seem as bad.

[Victoria]

Lori, you articulated what I was thinking about last night. As I was going to bed, I thought, "Wait. Hard times don't make us stronger, but they do show us how strong we actually are."

I know that most of the time, before we experience something, we watch other people going through it and think, "I could never handle that. I could never make it through something like that and still be a whole person." And then we experience it and survive, maybe even with grace, and it reveals a strength we had that we didn't know we could lean on.

You are right on. I think that bad times can make you 'weaker' if you constantly beat yourself up about events and play the would have, could have, should have, game. I think when you forgive yourself, that is when an inner strength can florish.